As a parent, it’s your responsibility to care for your child and keep them safe. Part of this responsibility includes talking to them about tobacco, alcohol, and drugs. It’s not easy, and it may make you feel uncomfortable. That’s understandable! It’s hard to think about your child growing up and engaging in unsafe behavior. But, research shows that the sooner you talk with them about these things the better. As a child therapist, I want to offer you some tips for how to talk to your child about the dangers of tobacco, alcohol, and drugs.
Begin Early!
Think about it, from a very early age children begin to pick up on the behavior of adults. So they will begin to take notice if an adult is drinking or smoking. Little kids mimic adults, and they want to do what you’re doing. So, it’s important to address this behavior as soon as possible. They may have questions about what you’re drinking or why an adult is smoking a cigarette. Simply answer their questions appropriately and tell the truth. Connecting with them now and showing them that you’re available to answer any questions they may have prevents it from becoming a taboo topic. If they see it as taboo, they might be afraid to bring it up with you. Think about it like this: connection prevents correction.
What should I do if my child is older and I am only now ready to talk to them about drugs and alcohol?
Though it is best to start talking to your kids about this when they are young, any age is a good age to talk to your child. When you’re talking to an older child, it’s best to start by determining what they already know. Then address any misconceptions they have, and answer their questions factually. Remember to stay calm and non-judgemental during these conversations.
Do Not Overreact
Your young child may come to you with a question about a family member’s drinking. Or, your teen may share that their friend tried a cigarette. What do you do? In moments like this, you might become struck with panic. But, you mustn’t overreact.
Overreacting shows your child that talking about these topics will elicit a strong emotional response from you. Thus, they may shy away from bringing up these topics in the future. But, that doesn’t mean they won’t continue to be exposed to tobacco, alcohol, or drugs. So, they must get their information from you so you know that they are learning the truth.
If you find yourself reacting strongly in these moments, stop and breathe. It’s okay to take a moment to collect yourself before addressing these topics. Remind yourself, that curiosity is normal.
Be Honest and Stick to the Facts
It can be tempting to try and scare your child away from using these substances. You might even lie about what happens if you use them. But in the end, this won’t do you any favors. Your child will find out about your mistruth and become upset. Arming them with the truth and the facts is the best thing you can do.
It’s important to keep the information you share with them age-appropriate. For example, if a young child (under the age of 5) sees someone smoking and asks you about it, you don’t need to go into the effects of nicotine on their brain. Instead, tell them that smoking is bad for your health and can make you sick. Then, allow them to ask you questions. Or, if your pre-teen asks you about alcohol, you may share with them that drinking too much can make you physically ill and harm good decision-making since alcohol slows down the brain. Furthermore, you can highlight the consequences of misuse. Share with them that drinking while driving can result in jail time, injuring yourself or others, and death. Like with younger children, allow them to ask you questions. Create a safe, non-judgmental environment for them to talk about these tough subjects.
Talk About Your Family’s Expectations and Rules
It’s important that you set clear boundaries with your child. Share expectations about using tobacco, alcohol, and drugs, even if you don’t think they are using them.
Here are some suggestions for ways to frame this discussion:
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Choose a time when you are both calm and in a good mood
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Explain why you are having this discussion (to keep them safe and healthy)
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Tell your child that you expect them to abstain from using these substances
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Let them know what the consequences may be if they break these rules
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Reiterate how proud you are of their good choices and behavior
During this conversation, practice what to do if they’re asked to use these substances. Talk with them about the importance of saying no, even if it’s hard to do. Then, have a conversation about talking to a trusted adult about what happened.
Remember, your child looks to you as an example. So, give them a good one.
This is pretty important. Many studies show that if a parent uses, a child is far more likely to use themselves. So, set a good example. I realize this may be easier said than done, but it’s important. Do as I say- not as I do won’t work here. If you’re struggling with tobacco use, alcohol misuse, or drug use and need help, contact the SAMHSA National Helpline here. Or, call 1-800-662-4357.
A Child Therapist Can Offer Support 
If you are looking for parent coaching or support and live in Georgia, a child therapist would be honored to speak with you about the ways we can help you be the best parent you can be. Furthermore, if your child is struggling with addiction, child counseling with a therapist can support them through recovery. Our skilled therapists have helped parents, children, and teens cope with their challenges and live a healthy and happy lifestyle.
Begin Child Counseling in Atlanta, GA:
If you are looking for support and live in the Roswell, GA area or anywhere in the state of Georgia, we invite you to contact our counseling center. A child therapist would love to speak with you about your concerns and discuss therapy options at our counseling clinic. To begin child counseling in Roswell, GA, or online therapy in Georgia, follow these steps:
- Contact our Atlanta, GA-based counseling practice
- Meet with a caring therapist
- Begin child counseling and begin the journey of recovery
Other Services Offered at Wellview Counseling
Child counseling isn’t the only service offered at our Atlanta, GA-based counseling practice. We offer a variety of services to help and member of your family on their journey towards healing. Other services offered include PTSD and trauma treatment, play therapy, child counseling, individual counseling, social skills groups for kids, therapy for postpartum anxiety and depression, trauma and PTSD treatment, chronic illness counseling, family therapy, and positive discipline parent education classes. We also offer online therapy for anyone living in Georgia to help meet your needs. Contact our Atlanta area mental health clinic to learn more about the many ways the counselors at Wellview Counseling can help you, your family, your child, or your teen!